1.28.2006
Mike and Mike
This is the most beautiful restaurant I've ever seen - it's truly fabulous at night. We had the expensive Vietnamese dinner here, and then yesterday went back with a group of people to have many glasses of tropical sangria at its beautiful outdoor bar.
Then we went shopping – in the shiznit – a neighborhood where Europeans do not go - the wholesale district - with a local girl we know from the office and her husband. We left the hotel at noon and got back at 7:45...and as we left, there was this one street we drove down right after it got dark, which our driver called "the most dangerous street in bangalore." Nice.
Mike and Mike:
At breakfast, two of my teammates were approached by two dorks from another big global company. It was their first day in India, and since they had a month ahead of them and only knew each other, C invited them along for drinks with us (at that beautiful place). One of them (Soccer Mike) was quite funny. Liked cheesy movies, Family Guy, and said things like "That fuckin guy" in a great New Yawk accent. We all liked him right away. The other one (Annoying Mike), was a moron. He is the kind of person that would make Mother Teresa want to kick his ass. He talks just to hear his own voice...says nothing you want to listen to...interrupts and distracts you while you're having enjoyable conversations with other people...
Highlights:
1. At the bar, AM had like 5 drinks, and told the bartenders to make his Long Island "smooth." Like he insisted on it, and then when he got the drink, Sent it Back! He was like "that's not good enough." UM. Then the bartender brought what was most likely the Same Fuckin Drink, and annoying mike was like "oh yeah, oh yeah."
2. AM went over and told some Indian man at the bar not to smoke, because he was allergic. I immediately lit up when he got back to the table.
3. We fought over who had to be in the car with annoying mike. Tim lost and did 2 shots before getting in the car. When it was my turn to ride with AM, I made him sit up front, and after asking our driver about 50 retarded questions (why don't they have lanes here?, etc.) our driver finally started TURNING UP THE RADIO every time AM starting talking.
4. Each time we went into a store, AM had to be served first. And he bought something everywhere. When, at our last stop, he ordered a custom silk shirt, we all decided to smother him with pillows when we got back to the hotel.
5. I had to tell AM, while walking down a supercrowded street, "DON'T TELL PEOPLE YOU'RE FROM THE UNITED STATES." Not only did he go, "Why?" but he goes, "I'm going to tell people I'm from Dubai." ...um...
6. Soccer Mike at one point said of Annoying Mike, "I'm going to stab him in the heart."
Oh, and Soccer Mike seemed like a normal guy, but apparently has a wife and didn't tell any of us, until later, when he went out with Tim and these other guys and Tim was so grossed out by his EPIC raunchy talk that he actually left and went back to his room.
...and my favorite Annoying Mike moment: He didn’t know where Oregon was. He said, "I just never thought about it." He didn’t even know that it was on the west coast. We said it was b/t California and Washington, and he goes, "Oh, like Washington State?"
